


If you´re still bleeding

by xxx_cat_xxx



Series: Whumping Peter Parker [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: (only mentioned), Canonical Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fever, Gen, Irondad, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Sick Peter, Sick Peter Parker, Sickfic, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Daddy Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, author needs a hug as well, spiderson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-28 05:27:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16717335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxx_cat_xxx/pseuds/xxx_cat_xxx
Summary: “You want another Advil?”He reaches for the packet on the table and offers a pill to Peter. But the boy just keeps staring ahead. The TV is on silent, the credits of something Tony doesn´t recognize running along, but Peter isn´t watching, appearing to be looking right through the screen instead. It doesn´t seem the kid has even realized the movie is over.He´s seen Peter more talkative with a bunch of broken bones and a concussion.---Peter is sick and gets dragged down emotionally by a movie. Tony tries to figure out how to talk to him about being okay with his feelings despite not being okay with his own.





	If you´re still bleeding

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Builder](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Builder/gifts).



Tony curses loudly and sets the wrench down onto his lab bench quite a bit harder than necessary. It is one of _those_ days. Pepper is somewhere on the other side of the country, it`s been raining for hours, Dummy managed to break the coffee machine, and fixing it turned out to be harder than it reasonably should be for an engineer of his caliber.

And then there is the kid. Peter showed up the day before to his stay-over weekend with a running nose that developed into a full-blown cold overnight, low-grade temperature included. Tony put his foot down when he realized that the boy was hardly able to keep his eyes open while working, banning him to the couch in the adjoining room with an unlimited access to all streaming services the industry has to offer.

“Looks like the Jura is a lost cause,” he informs Peter while sinking into the sofa next to him, making sure to stay just clear of the germ-infested zone around the kid. “But whom am I telling this? You´re much too young to appreciate the heavenly smell of freshly brewed Devil Mountain´s Black Label…”

“Mmh,” comes a non-saying reply.

Tony gives the boy a once-over. Peter is not looking much better than he did in the morning, and it doesn´t seem like he got any sleep, either. His eyes are puffy, and he is sniffling constantly, the bright-red nose giving him a striking resemblance to Rudolph the Reindeer.

“How´re you holding up?” Tony asks anyway.

“´m okay,” Peter says hoarsely.

Tony checks the StarkPad that´s monitoring the kid`s stats, noting that he is still warmer than normally, even for his not-quite-normal body.

“You want another Advil?”

He reaches for the packet on the table and offers a pill to Peter.

“Mmh.”

But the boy doesn´t move to grab it, just keeps staring ahead. The TV is on silent, the credits of something Tony doesn´t recognize running along, but Peter isn´t watching, appearing to be looking right through the screen instead. It doesn´t seem the kid has even realized the movie is over. Tony reads the stats again just to make sure he is not dealing with someone delirious from fever, but no, the boy is far from any danger zone.

He´s seen Peter more talkative with a bunch of broken bones and a concussion.

“Okay buddy, what´s going on?” he asks.

Peter takes so long to answer that Tony starts to think he hasn´t heard him.

“Mr. Stark, I´m really sory, but… could you just leave me alone for some time?”

His voice is so small that Tony has to lean forward to catch it.

“Woah. Okay.”

He is somewhat taken aback, but he´s not one to force his presence on other people, even if they are the last he´d expected to mind it. He pushes himself up from the couch.

“If I interrupted you in something embarrassing…” the joke dies on his lips when Peter finally turns his head towards him and he catches the boy´s eyes shimmering wet.

“I´m sorry, Mr. Stark, “ he says even quieter than before, “I didn´t want to be rude.”

“No, that´s okay.” Tony hesitates for a moment. “See, if you want me to leave, that´s all fine, I´m not mad or anything. Everyone needs some alone-time once in a while. But…you can tell me what´s going on, you know that, right? Talk about what´s troubling you?”

“You never talk about it.” It´s not an accusation, Peter doesn´t even raise his voice. It´s a statement, brought forward in the same neutral tone, and maybe this is why it hits unexpectedly.

“This is not about me, kid.”

It´s not an answer, and they both know it. But Peter lets it go. There´s half a minute of silence in which Tony hovers on the edge of the sofa´s armrest, trying to decide whether or not to leave the room.

“Pete?” he finally prompts.

“It´s nothing, really.” Peter tries half-heartedly.

“Sure. Obviously.”

The kid draws in a breath.

“Okay. It´s…just, silly. Like, I was watching this movie, _Super 8_. It´s about a group of friends helping an alien get back to its planet - kind of like _E.T._? Anyways, one of the boys´ mother dies in an accident, and the way they show it is just really really sad, and I… I don´t know.”

“Oh. Okay.” Tony starts to see where this is going, and it´s miles from what he had been expecting.

“It´s…stupid,” Peter continues. “I mean, I watched Harry Potter, and Lion King, and all these cheesy Disney Movies full of orphans, and I never cried. But now…” He pulls up his nose and wipes his eyes in a quick, embarrassed gesture.

“I´m… god, I´m just overreacting because I´m sick and I didn´t really sleep. I´m sorry, Mr. Stark, seriously.” Peter blushes under his pale pallour.

The kid in front of him looks nothing like Spider-Man at this moment, and Tony is not sure if he is up to this. Guiding him through life-or-death situations? Sure thing. But parenting? Every instinct tells him to vanish as quickly as possible. Tony Stark´s typical reaction would be to make an inappropriate joke, then hand it over to someone else. He needs May, or Pepper, or Rhodes, anyone whose empathic skills don´t express themselves through sarcasm and denial.

But then…This is just what his father would have done, what he _has_ done over and over again whenever Tony tried to approach him with his problems, tried to force him to behave like an actual parent should. Until Tony finally stopped coming to him, and started to deal with it all alone. And, for everything in the world, he doesn´t want Peter to experience the same.

He sits back down firmly, turns to face the kid.

“Okay. Listen. It´s not silly. Feelings are…not wrong.” He ignores the germs for a second and reaches out to remove Peter´s hand from his face, forcing him to look straight into the older man´s eyes.

“Everyone´s got different triggers. There´s no right or wrong when it comes to what affects you.”

A memory flickers in his head, a child´s drawing, as innocent as it can be, that set him off that very first time. Tony swallows, unsure of how to continue.

“Tell me, what exactly did the movie make you think about?” he asks.

“I don´t know…”

Peter doesn´t look at him while speaking, instead opting to stare at the crumbled tissues that are covering his lap.

“It´s not really that I miss my parents. I hardly remember them. Not even Ben…I mean, I do I miss him, I really do, but I got used to how it is now. It was more like…the movie made me remember, how it felt. After he was gone, how alone I was?” He shakes his head angrily. “That sounds so weird.”

“No, it doesn´t.” Tony is careful to keep his voice neutral, to filter out the emotions that are uncurling inside his chest. _Be practical. We can fix that._

“Is there anything you used to do when you felt like this?”

Peter shrugs, then shivers a little. “We used to go visit his grave, May and I.”

“That´s not an option with you cooking like that.” He gestures at the temperature curve on the tablet in his hand. “Any other ideas? You know, I can set up a live stream to the cemetery, it´s not exactly the same as paying him a visit, but maybe it comes close…”

“It´s okay, Mr. Stark. We - we don´t have to go anywhere. I´m better now, it was just…” he trails off, pulling up his nose. “Really, I´ll be fine.”

Tony looks at Peter, and although his eyes are still red-rimmed, although half of the sentence is make-believe, he understands that the other half is truth. The boy will be okay. Not fixed, because there are certain things that never heal completely, certain scars that can´t be made to disappear. But somehow, despite everything that has happened in this ridiculously short time he´s been alive, Peter has managed to keep the important parts of himself intact.

“Well,” Tony draws a deep breath, “I won´t say that I believe you, but let´s work with the pretense.”

Peter starts to say something, but a cough cuts him off.

“What about you pop another one of these with a lot of water, “ Tony tosses the Advil towards the boy, “and I start a spaceship movie to cheer up the mood?”

“I don´t think I want to see another movie.” A shudder runs through the kid and he pulls the blanket up to his chin. “I should just get some sleep.”

Tony can´t remember ever going to bed voluntarily, especially not when he was a teenager. But then, maybe he wasn´t the most representative specimen, either.

“That´s also fine. Friday, turn on the lights and the heater in Peter´s room, but keep both of them low,” he directs the ceiling.

“Ehm…actually…” Peter´s cheeks go red when he bites his lip.

“Yeah?”

“Could I just stay here?”

“Sure,” Tony shrugs. “Anywhere you like, kid. I´ll get back to the lab?”

This time, the smallest moment of hesitation is enough for him to understand.

Peter falls asleep quickly, his eyes still puffy, but the distress slowly vanishing from his expression. Tony wonders if he fucked up. But the boy wanted him to stay, even if he wouldn´t say it, and maybe that means that Tony hasn´t done so badly.

He thinks back to his own 15-year-old self, partying away in a boarding school. Not alone, exactly, he´s never had a problem finding company. Just not the kind that would sit at his bedside when he got sick.

Tony stands up to switch off the TV, then he stops, looking at the boy’s sleeping form for a moment with a slightly sad smile. He leaves the door ajar when he gets back to work.

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this prompt by Builder: _Tony comes in while Peter’s watching TV at the Avengers facility. Maybe the kid’s sick, or maybe just chilling. Tony talks to him or tries to sit down and join him, and Peter doesn’t want him to, but he has a hard time asking Mr. Stark to go away. Finally Tony’s like, what’s up with you? And Peter waffles, but admits that whatever he’s watching is getting to him emotionally, and Tony has a moment of, How do I talk to a kid about being ok with his feelings when I'm not ok with mine?_
> 
> The title is taken from the song "Youth" by Daughter, the full line runs: "And if you're still bleeding, you're the lucky ones.  
> 'Cause most of our feelings, they are dead and they are gone." It´s worth a listen.
> 
> Also, Devil Mountain´s Black Label is actually a thing, and it´s supposed to be one of the strongest coffees that exist. Don´t tell me that writing fics doesn´t improve your general knowledge...
> 
> Please leave comments if you liked this, they really mean a lot to me. If you are on tumblr, consider following me here: [xxx-cat-xxx.tumblr.com](https://xxx-cat-xxx.tumblr.com/) for updates and fic recommendations.


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